Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Nuke the Punchline: To Celebrate its Anniversary, OWS...

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, and so it is time to pick the winners of the last one:

To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street...

#5 CTCompromise: ...wait, what am I saying? They don’t even know what day of the week it is, let alone that it’s the 1 year anniversary!

#4 Yosoff: ...slept until noon, ate some Cheetos & then posted about how awesome Obama is to their 3 remaining Facebook friends.

#3 FormerHostage: ...screamed, cried, pooped themselves, and could only think of themselves. So, pretty much how everyone celebrates their first birthday.

#2 Crabby Old Bat: ...trashed a park, defecated in public, and realized that it’s really more of a drum “triangle” than a drum “circle” when there are only three people present.

And the best punchline goes to Son of Bob:


To celebrate its 1 year anniversary, Occupy Wall Street protesters once again left their parents’ basement for the day. It took forever to get enough players in Call of Duty.


Congratulations Son of Bob!

Now here's a line for you guys to meddle with:

Elizabeth Warren just found out...

13 comments:

  1. ...she's 47% likely to support Obama.

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  2. ...her DNA is 98% identical to chimps, so she is now claiming Monkey-Americans are a minority group.

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  3. that the stuff she was smoking with Barak wasn't a peace pipe.

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  4. that Dances with Wolves wasn't based on her family history.

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  5. that used car salesmen don't usually pay for a trade in with shiny beads.

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  6. when people ask to borrow some TP, they aren't referring to her summer home.

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  7. ...her great-great-great-grandma was dot-indian, not woo-woo-indian

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  8. that her parents originally named her Squatting Wolf.

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  9. that the term 'Native American' doesn't usually refer to anyone born in America.

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  10. . . . that she is part Indian, but it's not Cherokee. Her relatives from New Delhi just arrived for a visit.

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  11. . . . that Playboy is not interested in a centerfold of her to counterbalance Scott Brown's in Cosmo.

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  12. the thing she didn't build ain't working no more.

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  13. ...that scalping tickets to a David Bowie concert back in '82 doesn't make you more Native American. Riding Sarah Jessica Parker sidesaddle through a Bojangles doesn't either.

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