The 8 Hottest New Fashion Trends for Spring

It's starting to get a bit warmer outside, so girls, that means it is time to update your wardrobe.  With the recent changes in the military, some women are complaining about their fashion choices. I totally agree with these ladies that somebody should make them better fitting combat armor.  I mean, the armor is just too heavy and it's not really made to go around a woman's body.  Somebody should fix it, and it should be done right away.

In fact, I think there are a LOT of things that somebody should do, and pronto.

1- Make 34DD sumo wrestling gear.

2- Allow all men with abdominal issues to be attended in hospital maternity wards. Who knows? They COULD be pregnant.

3- Add a wing to all firehouses for female fire fighters....and then, of course, make them women-friendly fire protection gear.

3a- Make sure all fire victims weigh less than 100 lbs so that a female fire fighter could pull them out of a burning building.  Fire victims daring to weigh more will be heavily fined. And also, perhaps, dead.

4- Make NFL helmets, pads and uniforms in women's sizes in case a woman ever makes the team.

5- Make sure all building materials at construction sites are sized down so as female construction workers could easily lift them.  Who cares if the bridge collapses?

6- Require facial tissues be provided at all athletic events. When people's teams lose, sometimes people cry.

7- Start coordinating Bill a "First-Gentleman Wanna Be" wardrobe.  He will probably start trends involving little felt hats and boob belts.

8- Get that Nuking Politics Snow White chick 7 adoring dwarves.

Wait. Somebody already did that.

:)