Nuke the Punchline - Consummate Vs !!!!

Harvey over at IMAO has posted a new straight line of the day, so it is time to choose the winners of the last one:

Members of Obama’s “Coalition of the Willing” on Syria Will Include…

Apparently, today was "Stump Anonymiss with your Favorite Obscure Reference Day", huh? Well. You didn't. Thankfully, I have mad google skills...and help. Geeez!

All I can say is that O has himself a fine coalition lined up:

#10 Dohtimes:…Atsushi Watanabe, out to make a profit selling caskets, an unbelievably small profit according to Kerry.

#9 RAML: …no one.

#8 Smilin' Jack: …Boeing, General Dynamics, Lockheed Corporation, General Electric, North American Aviation, United Aircraft, Sperry Corporation, Raytheon, and McDonnell Douglas.

#7 Maverick: ...A flock of sheep in Tibet, 4 out of 5 dentists who use nitrous recreationally, and Aquaman’s naive brother-in-law ‘Tapwaterguy’.

#6 HokieGomer:…rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, butt-kickers, stuff-kickers and Methodists!

#5 jw: :…miley cyrus, who, like obama’s syria policy, is also offensive, much talked about and ultimately useless.

#4 gsmtiger: …Dianne Feinstein. All she does is talk about how if high capacity chemical weapons were banned worldwide there wouldn’t be this problem. Oh wait. They are.

#3 Jimmy.: …Kerry’s “unbelievably small” which is the same as Obama’s ‘Calculus’… of infinitesimals.

(Both Newton and Leibnitz just rolled over in their graves, although probably at different rates, df/dt.)

And my favorite straight line of the day was a tie between walruskkkch and  rodney dill:

walrus: Members of Obama’s “Coalition of the Willing” on Syria Will Include…Sandra Fluke. [Very willing :)]

rodney: Members of Obama’s “Coalition of the Willing” on Syria Will Include…Trogdor the Burninator [O wouldn't know majesty if it came up and bit him in the face :) ]

 Cookies to walruskkkch 
and rodney dill!

and kiss up cookies to walruskkkch:

Members of Obama’s “Coalition of the Willing” on Syria Will Include…Cookie haters.  [Do cookie haters exist? Besides Keln, of course :P]

Kiss up cookies 
to walruskkkch!

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Go see the winners of Bored Fusion 15: Covers Covered at You've Been Fused: 15. Then don't forget to submit your best title for Bored Fusion 16: Wheelbarrow (the fusion of a wheelbarrow and and IC engine with an engineer). I can't wait to see them :)

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My favorite NP punchlines:

Jeb Bush will award Hillary Clinton the "Liberty Medal" on the eve of the Benghazi Anniversary. The next award...

#3 Steve H :... will go to the Ancient Roman Empire on the eve of Good Friday.

#2 Bob in Feenicks :...won't be given out because, at this point, what difference does it make?

My favorite line was from FredKey:

Jeb Bush will award Hillary Clinton the "Liberty Medal" on the eve of the Benghazi Anniversary. The next award...will be the memorial wreath commemorating the death of Jeb's political career.

or...

...will be a stack of homemade cookies from Anonymiss to HokieGomer! (hey, if self promotion can work for Kerry, it can work for me!)  

Kiss up cookies to HokieGomer!

Toffee Trifle to FredKey
and HokieGomer!

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Here's a new line for you to try:

Coca-cola is set to launch the world's first HOT soda. The slogan...