Breaking: Obama Watches News; Learns He Is President

Seriously, though: That headline sounds like it could ALMOST be real, right?

It's becoming painfully, brutally obvious that Obama gets pretty much all of his information from the main-stream media, which is kind of sad for a guy who has access to the most advanced intelligence gathering system in the history of the world.

Bengahzi? Dude, heard about it from the New York Times (and that was so, like, two years ago).

NSA snooping? Learned about it same time you did.

IRS harassment of conservatives? Hmm...haven't heard a thing from MSNBC...

Then, of course, we get the predictable outrage fro President Spock/who is so outrageously outraged, so mad, so OVER THE TOP CONNIPTION FIT ANGRY, that he'll an investigator to look into it and get back to you sometime later.

Some time later, and regardless of what, if anything, his administration's investigation of itself turns up (Hint" It's someone else's fault), he'll declare it a Phony Scandal and wonder why people are still talking about it.

This happens EVERY FREAKING TIME! It' as predictable as the "Lather, Rinse, Repeat" on a bottle of shampoo: I JUST learned what my administration is doing,\ and no one is angrier than I am about this phony scandal. 

I'm not sure whether to be angry that they're so corrupt or amazed that they are so incompetent. It's got to be one or the other.