Nuke the Punchline - Ernestine. Hillary. What Difference Does it Make?

Harvey over at IMAO has posted a new straight line of the day. You should go check it out! My favorites from the last one are :

The IRS Said It Plans to “Improve Customer Service” This Coming Tax Season by…

Hiring Ernestine.

#5 Les.:.…dispatching ISIS collection agents. Similar name, almost as ruthless.  [But not quite :) ]

#4 rodney dill: ...People that rat on relatives and friends that cheat on their taxes will receive a free toaster oven.
 [Free until they pay *their* taxes :)]

#3 Oppo:  … assuring you that they always have your interest in mind. As well as your principal, your dividends . . .[ They're incredibly thoughtful folk... :)]

#2 Jimmy: …installing customer service TAX ROBOTS! (made in China)  [Perfect. :) ]

And my favorite straight line of the day was from Iowa Jim: 

The IRS Said It Plans to “Improve Customer Service” This Coming Tax Season by… answering all taxpayer questions with a recording of Hillary Clinton saying “What difference, at this point, does it make?”

[They're gonna try out honesty. That's new. :) ]

Cookies to Iowa Jim!

...and we can't forget Kiss up Cookies :) 

The IRS Said It Plans to “Improve Customer Service” This Coming Tax Season by…

Steve H:… giving Anonymiss cookies to the first 500 who file early.
[Nice incentive. Are you guys almost done yet? :P]

Burt: …asking if you drink tea with your anonymiss cookies.

 [Just say "No!"  Try water with lemon. Mmm.]

FormerHostage: …sending each taxpayer a scratch and sniff that smells like fresh baked sugar cookies that they can play with while on hold. [Torture. But *nice* torture. Clever :)]

c64wood: …replacing any refunds with Anonymiss’ cookies [Hmm. Let's take a vote. Who would rather have my cookies? :)]

Kiss Up Cookies to Steve H, Burt,

FormerHostage and c64wood!

The Musings of Anonymiss: 

“Dark times lie ahead of us and there will be a time when we must choose between what is easy and what is right.”

It was Dumbledore. Probably not Obama's speech writer.

Another one...
...the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance.